Sensible Erection | Menarche Parties: Celebrating 50 Years of Misery

Saturday, 3 January 2009

Menarche Parties: Celebrating 50 Years of Misery

quote [ I never thought learning about menstruation could be so much fun. This was truly a party we will never forget” ]

If my mom had attempted to do this for me, there would have been blood...hers.

[by Bodnoirbabe@7:55amGMT] [+10 WTF]

Comments

Narrenschiff said @ 8:02am GMT on 3rd Jan
augh

lilmookieesquire said @ 8:05am GMT on 3rd Jan
Highlights?

Private Days Feminine Disposable Bags (10 pack)
Pin the Ovaries Game
Puberty Marshmallow Game (Download)
Menstrual Trivia Game (Download)
Positively Puberty Game Instructions (Download)

Nihil said @ 9:32am GMT on 3rd Jan
The Pin the Ovaries game makes me ~~suspect~~ hope it's a spoof.

ckfahrenheit said @ 9:56am GMT on 3rd Jan
Reading their privacy policy makes me think they just might be serious

papango said @ 8:10am GMT on 3rd Jan
When girls in my family 'enter womanhood' they are allowed to drink at family gatherings. First time out, I got hammered on a homebrewed 'damson-wine' creation of my uncle's and puked the whole way home.

jimnasty said @ 10:20am GMT on 3rd Jan
...pixpls?

papango said @ 9:07pm GMT on 3rd Jan
Of a thirteen-year-old puking out the window of a station wagon while her family laughs? You sick sick man.

radioelectric said @ 1:05am GMT on 4th Jan
Don't forget the menstruation!

cb361 said @ 8:51am GMT on 3rd Jan [Score:2]
Testimonials are ironic, considering the origin of the word.

Dioxin said @ 8:58am GMT on 3rd Jan
I love fingerpainting!

cb361 said @ 9:00am GMT on 3rd Jan
Hey, this menstruation party is a cute idea. What was that? A slice of cake you say? Sure. Just a minute, is that what I think it is...?

hunk said @ 9:45am GMT on 3rd Jan
mmmmmmm.... cake.

Bodnoirbabe said @ 10:31am GMT on 3rd Jan
mmmmmmmmmmm.....blood clots!

Rafale0n said @ 2:27pm GMT on 3rd Jan
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.....dead eggs

blacksun said @ 6:07pm GMT on 3rd Jan
The cake is a lie!

cb361 said @ 9:56pm GMT on 3rd Jan
But high in essential iron.

ckfahrenheit said @ 9:54am GMT on 3rd Jan [Score:5 Funny]

hunk said @ 10:22am GMT on 3rd Jan
mmmmmmmmm... noobs

Rafale0n said @ 10:27am GMT on 3rd Jan
mmmmmmmmmmm...noobcakes

hunk said @ 8:24pm GMT on 3rd Jan
brilliant!

tamp said @ 10:24pm GMT on 3rd Jan [Score:3 Informative]
If you like Liver and the smell of iron and estrose, then moontime feasting may be for you. I love the taste of

Baxter_UK said @ 10:52pm GMT on 3rd Jan
+1 Moontime Feasting.

rattus said @ 12:45am GMT on 4th Jan
Where is my +1 Not Surprised mod?

mattfish said @ 10:18am GMT on 3rd Jan
# 9” dinner plate (8)
# 7” dessert plate (8)
# 13” napkin (16)

ComposerNate said @ 10:27am GMT on 3rd Jan [Score:2 Underrated]

Bodnoirbabe said @ 10:30am GMT on 3rd Jan
Aw hell yeah! You got my ass just right!

ComposerNate said @ 10:32am GMT on 3rd Jan
:)

ComposerNate said @ 3:55pm GMT on 13th Jan
Even the freckle?

ComposerNate said @ 10:30am GMT on 3rd Jan [Score:1 Underrated]
I hope you like it, Bodnoirbabe.

donnie said @ 12:34pm GMT on 3rd Jan [Score:2 Insightful]
Ceci n'est pas une pipe.

ComposerNate said @ 1:09pm GMT on 3rd Jan
Certainly reminiscent.

nik said @ 11:32am GMT on 3rd Jan
And yet they never celebrate a young boy's first ejaculation. What the fuck? Totally unfair.

dominion236 said @ 1:47pm GMT on 3rd Jan
I don't think a boy's first time shooting a loaded gun instead of blanks may be as traumatizing as a chick bleeding on herself.

CthulhuDances said @ 3:39pm GMT on 3rd Jan
Especially since the physical feelings attached to it tend to be polar opposites.

Hazel said @ 3:52am GMT on 4th Jan
Health classes spend a lot of classroom time discussing menarche and the menstrual cycle. I don't remember nearly as much time spent discussing pubertal-onset ejaculation. It leads me to wonder if the difference is that the pads/tampons companies make a LOT of money on menstruation-related products, but the tissue, lotion, socks, and laundry detergent industries do not make profits off ejaculation that can be directly tracked to pubertal use.

snowfox said @ 5:46am GMT on 5th Jan
There are girls who never get that education and then honestly fear they are dying when it happens, so it doesn't surprise me there is emphasis on that. We got a talk about this in fifth grade when I was in school. Boys and girls were separated and the boys' lecture was about wet dreams so they wouldn't live in shame an humiliation thinking they'd pissed themselves. Probably they also warned them about randomly pitching tents, but then again maybe not.

Crysallis said @ 12:22pm GMT on 3rd Jan
Hell yes!

nFiend said @ 12:39pm GMT on 3rd Jan
Thumb?

Bodnoirbabe said @ 8:12pm GMT on 3rd Jan
Google image search for "menarche".

Ubie said @ 3:30pm GMT on 3rd Jan
I can't for the life of me remember the 1st time i heard about one of these. I know it was on a t.v. show, maybe on HBO? Something 'edgy' and blah blah blah. All i'm coming up with is a Mad Men or Weeds type show, but for the life of me i can't remember.

Ubie said @ 3:44pm GMT on 3rd Jan
It was Nip/Tuck

sanepride said @ 5:36pm GMT on 3rd Jan [Score:4 Insightful]
I can recall that more than once during my careless youth I did celebrate when my girlfriend had her period.
whew!

anger_die said @ 5:37pm GMT on 3rd Jan [Score:4 WTF]

shiney things said @ 6:50pm GMT on 3rd Jan
Point of interest, i am menstruating right now.

sacrelicious said @ 6:56pm GMT on 3rd Jan
pix or it didn't happen.

Ank said @ 7:43pm GMT on 3rd Jan
::must resist the urge to put a picture of a bloodied maxi pad:::::

Bodnoirbabe said @ 8:13pm GMT on 3rd Jan
Holy crap, me too!

So all of us SE girls have there cycles in sync, right? Who's the alpha female then?

kitten said @ 8:28pm GMT on 3rd Jan
I am not... :(

I feel very left out.

hildeaux said @ 3:51am GMT on 4th Jan [Score:1 Informative]
Mine was last week :/

brat#3 said @ 4:26am GMT on 4th Jan [Score:2 Informative]
Me too, and I'm hoping it's the last one I get for a year or so. Have to be some benefits to pregnancy, right?

Oh, and bigger boobs.

robotroadkill said @ 5:31am GMT on 4th Jan
Congrats! Will this be Brat #1? for you?

brat#3 said @ 5:33am GMT on 4th Jan [Score:1 Underrated]
Thanks :) Aiming for number 2 now. #1 was a fantastic result, we aim to replicate the experiment.

Bodnoirbabe said @ 4:09am GMT on 5th Jan
Congratulations!

papango said @ 10:24pm GMT on 3rd Jan
It's not me, mine started a couple of hours after I read your comment. I'm a beta female at best (or very very suggestable).

tamp said @ 11:35pm GMT on 3rd Jan
tamp or tampon question mark

we smell odorous amour of our failed fruits harvest over these net tubes...

Excited Corpse said @ 9:30pm GMT on 3rd Jan
well....i am pooping right now

Bodnoirbabe said @ 9:31pm GMT on 3rd Jan
You post while you're on the toilet, or do you have very lose bowels?

ComposerNate said @ 9:41pm GMT on 3rd Jan [Score:1 Funny]
Not everything is either/or.

jarringpeach said @ 10:19pm GMT on 3rd Jan
Just finished.

spite48 said @ 12:44am GMT on 4th Jan
I have a very bad nose-bleed.

Dragons_wine said @ 11:19pm GMT on 3rd Jan
If my mother had tried to do this to me I'd have murdered her in her sleep.

radioelectric said @ 1:07am GMT on 4th Jan [Score:1 Funny]
Simon Amstell: So uh, one of the girls, I don't know which one. It would probably be wrong to name them, maybe it's wrong to say it at all. Should I stop? No, OK. Um, she had her first, you know, "becoming a woman" experience in our studio.
Mark Lamarr: And you filmed it!
Simon Amstell: No, we didn't film it! No. It happened in one of the dressing rooms. We've since redecorated, it was fine... so anyway, they came back and we were all very sensitive about it. We introduced them as our favourite band in the world... period.

radioelectric said @ 1:08am GMT on 4th Jan
Whoops, the context is the child pop group "S Club Juniors" performing on Pop World.

brat#3 said @ 4:28am GMT on 4th Jan
I <3 Simon Amstell.

Amy Winehouse on NMTB was f'ing hysterical.

Hazel said @ 3:45am GMT on 4th Jan
I like the idea of a family celebration of menarche. This party kit is ridiculous.

tamp said @ 3:52am GMT on 4th Jan

nFiend said @ 1:59pm GMT on 4th Jan
I always knew it: Uterus = Baphomet!

tamp said @ 3:03pm GMT on 4th Jan
boys need a uterus penyiata

hildeaux said @ 3:49am GMT on 4th Jan
I've heard of people doing parties like this, though I hadn't seen this site before. I'll admit the blood-red theme is pretty tacky, but how is this any different than Quinceaneras, Bat Mitzvahs, or any other rite of passage into adulthood? All that girly stuff sounds like something I would have loved at that age.

Getting your period is fucking scary. I think it's pretty cool that there are people out there who are this close, open and supporting with their daughters. It would have been nice to know that all the other adult females in my life had gone through the same thing and were there to support me.

Am I alone here, ladies?

Hazel said @ 3:57am GMT on 4th Jan [Score:1 Informative]
Would it be appropriate at the family menarche-acknowledgment party to also give one's daughter a moderately-powered non-anatomical vibrator for cramps-relief massage, and not mention anything about vibrating other regions? I always thought that rubbing the lower abdomen really helped the cramping.

snowfox said @ 5:52am GMT on 5th Jan
True story: vigorous masturbation relieves even the worst cramps.

ckfahrenheit said @ 8:55am GMT on 4th Jan
THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I PASS ON YOUR MILKSHAKE

tamp said @ 1:45pm GMT on 4th Jan
I Could Have Had A V8!(Stick your carrot in it.)

My V8 brings all the boys to the yard,
And their like
It's better than yours,
Damn right it's better than yours,
I can teach you,
But I have to charge

I know you want it,
The thing that makes me,
What the guys go crazy for.
They lose their minds,
The way I wind,
I think its time

La la-la la la,
Warm it up.
Lala-lalala,
The boys are waiting

My V8 brings all the boys to the yard,
And their like
It's better than yours,
Damn right it's better than yours,
I can teach you,
But I have to charge

I can see youre on it,
You want me to teach thee
Techniques that freaks these boys,
It can't be bought,
Just know, thieves get caught,
Watch if your smart,

kang said @ 5:46pm GMT on 4th Jan
There will be blood ... every month, around the same time.

sacrelicious said @ 6:00am GMT on 5th Jan
I drink your milkshake! my straw reaches across the room and I DRINK YOUR MILKSHAKE!!!

oooh, strawberry!

snowfox said @ 6:48am GMT on 5th Jan
Just watched the film and was somewhat confused at times. Is the book worth reading?